Welcome back, people who are bored at home while a pandemic rages. I am so glad you have taken time out of your schedules to follow my adventures. Behold, the great hilarity that is my life. No complaints here. As long as I can laugh I know that life is good.
| Me, after rearranging the octopus collection at work, for the thousandth time. I apparently work with someone who enjoys rearranging these not in color order. They know it annoys me. |
Israeli moments of pride:
So my eldest son drafted into the army in August. He loves basically everything about it. Which, if you know him, is not a surprise. He was ummm, not the easiest child (I am trying to be kind here) but he has always been satisfied with whatever was going on around him. And unrelated, he has always been the easiest person to give a gift to. He loves everything, and one of his first phrases around age 1.5yrs was ga-goo (thank you). So that is just the background to why it is not surprising that he is happy.
Also I am going to highly recommend a gap year pre-army program. He was very skeptical when we first brought up the subject but it was definitely good for him. It gives the kids (boys especially) an extra year to mature and learn how to live away from home with people that are maybe a bit different. They also learn important life skills like how to share a bathroom with a lot of people, how to eat food that mommy and daddy didn't cook. etc.... So anyway this has definitely helped in his adjustment to army life.
Okay so he had his first ceremony of the army the night before I left for America. His swearing in ceremony. It was awesome and emotional and also crazy crowded with minimal covid rules despite a raging pandemic back in October. Basically, once you have a spot at the ceremony (It is all standing and was at the Kotel (Western Wall) you cannot move. A few thousand people are pressed in around you. Because Israelis have big families and Israel is small so no one lives too far away to attend a ceremony. And they all come.
Someone I ended up one step in front of the rest of my family. Which meant that I believe I am now part of a very large Yemenite family. I already know half of their names and they leaned over me many times to take photo, pass masks, etc... The bubby of my new family thankfully also kept reminding her 60yr old kids to put their masks on.
Ceremony was great and we are so proud of how our first baby is managing. But back to us. We managed to blend in by bringing food as we have been told to do by fellow Israelis. It was basically a parade of families marching through the Arab shuk on the way to Kotel, every family carrying baskets of food, coolers of drinks, chairs, blankets etc... Israelis know how to eat, that is for sure. After the ceremony, a quick dash home because my plane was leaving a few hours afterwards. But more on that later.
And now for an only in Israel moment: When this boy went into the army, he needed to get permission to keep his beard. Because in the army you cannot just have a beard because you like beards or are too lazy to shave. You basically need a reason and the reason for most is religious. So he tells me that he has to go to see some officer (sorry but I do not know the ranks) on his base. Basically the person in charge of rules, uniforms, appearance, etc... And from him, he has to get permission. So he explains that this person asked him several questions about Judaism, basically for my son to prove that he is actually religious and knowledgeable. So I of course asked him, so is this the Rabbi of your base? To which the answer was, no, he is Druze and he is in charge of appearance and he is terrifying etc...Well, knock me over with a feather, this was a surprise to me. This is basically Israel in a nutshell.
I now bring you Hebrew funnies #1
World Traveler:
Let's see, what other fascinating things have happened
to us in the past few months. oh, I went to The United States for a quick visit
to see the family. Honestly, until I got on the airplane, I wasn't sure it was
going to happen. Between waves of Covid , airport closures, etc... and one
cancelled trip, it was not clear. But I managed to slip in and out of the USA
for a ten day trip. Only required five covid tests I believe. You are probably
wondering, what did you do during your time in the good old USA? Excellent
question. let's skip the obvious part about visiting family. I'll get back to
that. Mainly, I spoke English. For ten glorious days I spoke only in English and
it was amazing.
So here is a bit of back story. I was supposed to head to the good old USA in November 2020 to visit my parents. But obviously with Covid and my job that did not happen. So I took my travel voucher and waited. I have to request vacation a year in advance. So each year in December I need to choose for the entire coming year. So again, December 2020 I put in a request for two weeks in November. Why November? Because it is not a popular time to request so I usually do not have issues getting it approved. And the prices to travel are decent and there usually isn't snow yet on the East Coast of the USA.
Anyway, I eventually make it onto the airplane. I survive TLV-LHR with a seatmate who apparently did not get the memo that we have a pandemic. Then LHR-PHL which only one minor snafu of me standing in the wrong line and almost going through customs to enter into the UK. You might be thinking, well, airports are large and confusing. Except, well, I have been through the London airport at least five times and English is my first language. So it should not have been this confusing. I make it to the airplane where there are approximately 25 people in the entire coach section and that was amazing. Everyone had their own row. And a reminder to all, British Airways are very free with their in-flight cocktails.
I arrive in Philly. Manage to survive passport control. Which FYI America, stop being so serious. I am a citizen. I am in my 40's. I am probably one of the least threatening people you will meet. I am not who you are looking for. Let's just say the border control guy did not even crack a smile for my answers. My luggage was basically three outfits, one pair of shoes and 40lbs of snacks . I brought Israeli snacks for everyone. So of course when he asks if I have any fresh fruits, vegetables, seeds etc, I am forced to respond, "Nope, but I have a lo of snacks." He was not amused. But he did let me in.
An out of order trip summary follows:
I find my bag, exit the airport and suddenly I am outside with zero phone service because my cell has gone on strike. After 10 minutes of slight panic I manage to reach my parents who were waiting nearby. I get into the car and the fun can officially begin. 10 days filled with trips to Wawa, seeing friends, food and adult beverages. My mother started cooking like two months in advance. So much food. And visiting the Philadelphia Art Museum. Not for the art. But because I wanted to re-enact Rocky running up the steps. Something I had not done since I was a teen. Two things: This is actually super fun to do. But also, it is a lot more steps than it seems like. But then you go and google how many steps and it is not very many. Then you might feel sad. Luckily the next activity is flight of beer tasting.
Oh, and did I mention that midtrip my brother and sister came in to surprise my parents? We had schemed this whole thing, as all good siblings do. I even had shirts printed for the occasion. And yes, we wore those shirts. But back to the surprise. Good family friends went to pick them up at the airport and the surprise was epic and awesome. So epic that I cannot share the video here because someone who shall remain nameless (and if you know me, you know it is not me) says some bad words. But back to the shirts. I made everyone wear them when we went to the apple festival. Oh, what's that you might be asking yourself? Perhaps you do not understand where I grew up. An apple festival is fairly normal. Lots of fun sibling times.
I do some whirlwind visiting my friends up in NY/NJ including a stop at my forever besties mansion. I mean, I invited myself to sleep over there, The service there was excellent. Five stars for the cocktails, breakfast, homemade challah and tons of laughs. It helps when you bring old pics of you guys as teenagers to show your friends horrified teenage children. I really am the best friend.
Next stop to visit more long time friends and I ended up receiving tons of clothing which saved me hours of shopping, not to mention money. Everyone needs that friend that first of all you can be yourself with and who knew you as 22 year old Arielle. And that you can send pics of yourself to, from a dressing room and get an honest opinion. And should she open a clothes selling business from home and you come over and she hands you a full bag of clothing after making sure it all fits, well, who am I to deny her that pleasure? Then off to Starbucks to meet as many other friends who were randomly free on a Sunday in October. It also happened to be Halloween which means you get to see some hilarious costumes in there drinking coffee acting like they aren't dressed as cows or sexy pig or whatever.
Then it was time to return home. After first having a super fun brunch/firepit situation at my parents with friends we have all known for my entire life, we must eat traditional smores together!
That is the basic trip summary. Catching up with friends and family. Shopping. Eating and drinking. And so much English. My family thinks I had too much fun on my vacation so I made them this little collage. ;-)
Okay, there was a whole mess with my return flight because of covid. Tons of flights were cancelled. I will spare you the story. Eventually I get on a flight from PHL-BOS.
| Ran into these guys in the Philly airport |
Let me remind you that I am a native English speaker. I am also quite sure that I still speak it quite well. I also am the owner of an Ivy League education (go Lions, don't hold it against me). I arrive in Boston and need to get from the domestic to the international terminal. Should be easy right? I have a few hours. I've been to airports before. I can read. So I ask for information at the desk about how to get there. The guy tells me to look down and follow the purple arrows on the floor. Or I can take a bus. But to me it was unclear if this was like a city bus or an internal airport bus. I asked how long the walk is. 15 minutes he says, so off I go. I work out ,so no biggie. But I mean, if it were no biggie, it would not be part of this blog.
Ten minutes later, I am still following the purple arrows yet have ended up in a parking garage. Note to future self. Ask more questions. So I backtrack along the purple arrows and can not figure this out. So I exit the airport. In Boston. In November. In flip flops. Anyway, after running around a bit more outside I find another human also trying to get to the international terminal. After much confusion we find the bus and I Israeli my way onto it. That means ummm, just making sure I don't get knocked out of the way. Okay, so off I go. I make it to the international terminal. No time to celebrate though. As I don't actually have a ticket yet, because of the flight confusion. So I take my sweaty self to the desk where someone who definitely does no want to be at work is there to help me.
In order to return back to Israel I need to have a negative PCR test within 72 hours. In order to guarantee this without paying money, I took a few different tests at different drug stores. Well, due to flight delays that means that my last valid test was 76 hours prior and not 72. I had taken a more recent test but those results were not back yet. But aside form this issue I did have the other 10 forms prepared that I needed to travel back to Israel via London. I explained the hours to this woman at the desk and she started counting hours on her hands. I do not know exactly what happened but, despite being in an unfriendly mood, she stamped all of my papers as valid. And a good thing too because I assumed my results would be in when I arrived in London. Nope, they arrived a day after I got back to Israel.
So there I am in Boston now with ticket in hand. Very sweaty but who cares. Once again, BOS-LHR was empty! Whole row and cocktails to myself. Thanks British Airways. You screwed up my tickets, you did not have kosher food that I ordered, you did not have the upgrade I paid for, but you did have an empty plane and vodka and cranberry (and you did refund me $61 for my troubles). Make it to London where this time, I do not get lost. Buy myself the traditional coffee and head off to find my plane.
Once again the crowd from LHR-TLV apparently does not know there is a worldwide pandemic. One shouting match at the gate and a lot of confusion but then I am back on the plane. No, I was not part of the shouting match. I just yell at people silently and make faces behind my mask. This might be a problem when I no longer need a mask. Anyway, once on the plane, I have my fancy seat upgrade with a silent seatmate who does know there is a pandemic. However, she does not seem to know that if she doesn't get up to let me back into the row but instead, scooches over one inch, I will step over her. If she doesn't mind my bum in her face then what do I care? She does not seem to care. Ahhh, back with my peoples, no personal space.
I safely arrive back in Israel, make it through robotic passport control, get my bags, act natural as I pass through customs and get to the part where we all get tested for covid. I had prepaid so the line was quick and soon enough I was outside. Israel might be a lot of things and things do not always work as we think they should but this place knows how to handle covid testing. Sign up, show your health fund card, get swabbed, get a bracelet that shows you've been swabbed and goodbye. Back out to quarantine at home until you get your results.
Remember that extra test I took in the USA just in case my flight got delayed? That I assumed I would get results for while in London? Well, I got those results back a few hours after getting the results from my landing in Israel. In case anyone is wondering: Negative.
| Got myself a little souvenir at the apple festival |
Back to regular life. Almost. The way my annual vacation came out, I still had almost a week free after my travels. I wanted to plan a fun day out with the hubby. Originally I wanted a relaxing spa day. But then during my planning, I am not sure exactly what happened but I ended up planning a day out in Tel Aviv on these pumped up Segway type things. At first I was freaked out but as it turns out, it was super fun. And because my day of fun was on a random weekday we ended up having a private tour since other people work normal hours.
And in short summary! Since then we've had a whirlwind of class trips, Thanksgiving (yes we still celebrate it), Chanukah, and no fewer than 100 messages from schools about schedule changes due to Covid. My kids usually take it all in stride. Usually. So a few pics just for fun.
| Aroma holiday themed chocolate, always fun |
| Matching pajamas circa 2006 and 2021 |
| Birthday coffee before school |
One more for the road:
I am going to end this blog with a little Hebrew gem for those of you who have managed to hang on and make it through this blog. Over the past few years I have been slowly learning more Hebrew slang. I understand a fair amount of it now but it is very very rare for me to use it. I always ask my coworkers to explain slang to me. Well, a few weeks ago I was at work in the NICU and a mother was chatting with me. After a few minutes of chatting I managed to toss in a slang term without even thinking about it and planning for it. I of course immediately checked with friends to be sure I had used it properly. Now every time I see this mother I think to myself. YES, you have made it. You can use slang,
Of course, one week later I didn't understand a doctor who asked me to fix his mask but whatever. Let us enjoy our accomplishments.
I'll end this for real with a few more funny photos. I am a sucker for funny signs.
| Just me acting like myself, in a coffee shop |
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